Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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