she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
no more duck duck goose at the bar
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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