5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
me + whiskey = a bad person
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Randomize