I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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