that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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