Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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