dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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