You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
