I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
