So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
