I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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