I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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