absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
