You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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