Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
