I have demons in me.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
