Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Randomize