This is not my ceiling
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
