I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize