the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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