then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
