i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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