How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
It's no shave November. This is our time.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
