We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
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