Got a toothbrush?
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
