I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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