ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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