Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
So much Jack, so little girl.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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