You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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