one two three fourrrrnication!
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
