We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
