I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
God I need to hump something, right now.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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