I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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