I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
