i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
