I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
i believe in u and ur pee
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