dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
