I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize