we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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