So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
