One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Drake has all the answers
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
