Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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