i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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