Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
