problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Acid is not a monday night drug
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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