Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize
