end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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