Porn is love you can see.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Randomize