He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
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