I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I skipped work to stalk him.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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