They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
